Best Of Blurt Vol. 1: The Fish Needs A Bike-ink 19
Ok, if you are not in EXACTLY the right state of mind, this raspy voiced set of saxophone stranglers will drive you nuts. And I mean that in a bad way. It's a "Best Of" album, and frankly, I'd hate to hear the stuff that didn't make it onto this disc. Some stuff is instrumental(*), and some has a tortured vocal backing from Ted Milton, who, when not singing, is abusing a saxophone. There's a guitar and drums, and either highly sophisticated sound distortion software, or a crappy Radio Shack mixing board bought at a yard sale.
We get the lyrics for some but not all of the songs. "Fish Needs A Bike" is sadly absent, but the foot fetish anthem "Cherry Blossom Polish" is included, albeit typed in a difficult to read style so popular with the arty set. I'm not wildly impressed; the closest thing to cleverness is the line, "I was not born tomorrow." You heard it here, save yourself the pain of the rest of this disc.
For some reason, I thought this band came from San Francisco, but I'm happy to report they are Brits hailing from Hereford (*), so not all the weird records I got this week are left coast. Repeated listening to this record reveals diminishing returns. After three spins around the turntable, I'm happy to report that while this record may be for sale in your local indie store, I can't recommend it unless you are trying to get a New Year's Morning, post-bachelor party hangover without consuming intoxicants.
(*) =Please note the sheer professionalism of this scribe...
"Carl F Gauze is a wealthy but reclusive student of the arts, semi-retired from a stellar career as an insurance calendar salesman. His real fortune derives from his great grandfather, Herman S. Gauze, who invented the sterile surgical dressing in Zurich shortly before the First World War. Because of Switzerland's neutrality and the obvious humanitarian uses of this bandage during the tragedy, he amassed a vast fortune selling the dressing to both sides. He's recently been looking at bikes, and can't decide between a Harley Fat Boy or a Vespa. Decisions, decisions..."
Some people only have themselves to blame, right?